Nobody likes to think about what will happen after they’re gone, but planning ahead can save your family a lot of heartache. One of the biggest concerns for parents is making sure their children don’t end up fighting over inheritance. Money and possessions can bring out strong emotions, and even the closest siblings can find themselves at odds. To help keep the peace and avoid family drama, it’s important to take some steps now to make sure your wishes are clear and fair. Here are some simple ways to make the inheritance process as smooth as possible and keep your family relationships intact.

 

 

Divide your assets equally amongst your children

The most obvious way to discourage your children from quarreling over their inheritance is to treat them all equally. Just like when they were young–don’t play favorites. If you feel one is more deserving than the others, consider gifting them your property while you are still living. However, be careful what assets you give away. High value assets, such as real estate, can be subject to gift tax and/or capital gains taxes, which we will discuss in another blog. But gifting is a good way to be sure your heirlooms end up in the hands of the ones who will appreciate them the most.

An equal split may be challenging if your estate includes property that cannot be easily divided, such as real estate. It may not be feasible to leave the family home to all of your children and permit one to reside there. Consider leaving instructions that your property must be sold and the proceeds equally distributed.

 

Have the conversation with your family before you die

If you decide to leave more to one child, or leave one or all of them out of your estate plan, tell them your plan and explain your reasons behind it. Often, parents will feel they should leave a larger share to a child who is struggling financially. For instance, if your daughter is a Wall Street banker, and your son is an elementary school teacher, their resources are not equal. Or, perhaps one child gave up opportunities for financial gain to come home and care for you in your elder years, and you want to compensate her for it.

These are certainly not easy conversations to have, and despite your good intentions, may still end with conflict and resentment. However, this will avoid the element of surprise, and with the passage of time, your children will come to terms with your decision.

 

Don’t leave them anything at all

You may choose the “spend it all plan,” spending all of your assets during your lifetime to avoid leaving behind an inheritance, or, you may leave your entire estate to charity. Consider the organizations and issues that have been important to you and your family. Whether it’s education, healthcare, environmental conservation, or another cause, choose charities that align with your family’s values and passions.

Where there are no assets to squabble about, your children are more likely to be united. They may curse you for it, but you won’t be around to witness it. After all, it is your money, do with it as you please.

 

Need help getting your plan on Paper? Contact an Experienced Estate Planning Attorney Now

Planning your estate might not be the easiest conversation to have, but it’s one of the most loving things you can do for your family. By being proactive, clear, and fair, you can help prevent misunderstandings and ensure that your legacy is one of love and unity, not conflict. Remember, the goal is to leave behind more than just assets—you want to leave behind a sense of peace and togetherness. If you need help creating an estate plan that meets your goals, contact Attorney Jill M. Santiago to schedule a call or consultation by clicking the link below.